One of Funniest Mails Ever

Actual call centre conversations !!!!!

Calling Customer Care is very tough -
Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?".
Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?".
Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre".
Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours".
Samsung Electronics
Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about".
Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator: "I think you mean the telephone point on the wall".
RAC Motoring Services
Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia?"
Operator: " Doesn't the product name give you a clue?"
Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France):
"If I register my car in France, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?"
Directory Enquiries
Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please".
Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"
Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off".
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland".
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:
"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on".
Another Tech-Support -
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
Customer: "OK".
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?".

Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".
Customer Care People are Extra-ordinary -
Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
Now Customer is Smart Here -
Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?".
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There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you Bought it from."


Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too $*%ing stupid to own a computer!!!!!"
-- Keep on laughing till you fell from your Chair
- - Kalingaa..

History will absolve me.

I have always believed that "what legend and leaders thought" was way aheaf of their time. It was act of shear determination and will power that is essential for a human to succeed in way of life.
"Condemn me. It does not matter. History will absolve me." - Fidel Castro
I have an intrest to look into writings of people who took challange to fight against mightiest enemy they can have. GreatPoet Surya Kant "Nirala" (or few claim tah it is written by Dr. Haribansh Rai Bachchan but i believe Nirala wrote this) wrote this legendary poem to give a glimpse of what is truth behind these people's success ....
Lehron Se Darkar Nauka Paar Nahin Hoti,
Himmat Karne Waalon Ki Kabhi Haar Nahin Hoti.

Nanhi Chinti Jab Daana Lekar Chalti Hai,
Chadti Deewaron Par Sau Baar Fisalti Hai,
Mann Ka Vishwaas Ragon Mein Saahas Bhartaa Hai,
Chadkar Girna, Girkar Chadna Na Akharta Hai,
Mehnat Uski Bekar Har Baar Nahin Hoti,
Koshish Karne Waalon Ki Kabhi Haar Nahin Hoti.

Dubkiyan Sindhu Mein Gotaakhor Lagata Hai,
Jaa Jaakar Khaali Haath Lautkar Aata Hai,
Milte Na Sahaj Hi Moti Gehre Paani Mein,
Badta Doona Vishwaas Isi Hairaani Mein,
Muththi Uski Khaali Harbaar Nahin Hoti,
Koshish Karne Waalon Ki Kabhi Haar Nahin Hoti.

Asafaltaa ek Chunauti hai Sweekaar Karo,
Kya Kami Reh Gayi Dekho Aur Sudhar Karo,
Jab Tak Na Safal Ho Neend Chain Ki Tyago Tum,
Sangharshon Ka Maidaan Chod Mat Bhaago Tum,
Kuch Kiye Binaa Hi Jai Jaikaar Nahin Hoti,
Koshish Karne Waalon Ki Kabhi Haar Nahin Hoti.
-- Keep the will power in you
- - Kalingaa...

Poetry - by Uncle Ho

"Ho Chi Minh" remains a cult figure throughout the world for his stand for Nationalism and Vietnam. He was "Uncle Ho" for all who believed in independence without any capitalistic and imperialistic force. He wrote these two poems while in prison of French colonials.

GOOD DAYS COMING

Everything changes, the wheel
of the law turns without pause.

After the rain, good weather.

In the wink of an eye

The universe throws off
its muddy cloths.

For ten thousand miles
the landscape

Spreads out like
a beautiful brocade.

Gentle sunshine.
Light breezes. Smiling flowers,

Hang in the trees, amongst the
sparkling leaves,

All the birds sing at once.

Men and animals rise up reborn.

What could be more natural?

After sorrow comes happiness.

FREE, I WALK ON THE MOUNTAIN
AND ENJOY THE VIEW

Mountains. Clouds.
More mountains. More clouds.

Far below a river gleams,
bright and unspotted.

Alone, with beating heart,
I walk on the Western Range,

And gaze far off towards the South
and think of my comrades.

- Ho Chi Minh
-- Keep your Faith in your Natianal Uniqueness
- - Kalingaa...

Khamoshiyan Gungunane Lagi !!

परिंदो को मिलेगी मंजिल एक दिन
ये फैले हुए उनके पर बोलते हैं ...
वही लोग रहते हैं खामोश अक्सर
जमाने में जिनके हुनर बोलते हैं ...
-- Keep the Words for better use
- - Kalingaa...

Mercy

And then no one will grasp why we feel pain here
And who before whom is guilty.
This silence an unbearable load
For a heart who loves your world for naught
How can my eyes be glad
If my corpse is left unclothed ?

Constitutional freedom of "Speech and Expression"

Being in indian democracy and born in a open & righteous family, I always knew that we can speak anything if we have a faith and command of that topic. This never meant to offend anyone but being true to myself was a dignity I always Njoied. In course of life, some time this strength meant being arrogant and hard to others as truth is not always right. But I choose truth over all because i knew that at end of the day all will feel good for the same.

Now after so many years of that air has made me a sharp and spontanous truth speaker which is not good to be in social life. Till date it was just school, college and friends and so.. But now while changing myself to a new environment I feel hard to be silent. Also the change comes so drastically that I am a geographic zone where monarchy is alive, no freedom of speech at all, people just dont care for their right (i think so) and worst of all they have no laws at all. So either I will have to change according to them or I will not the same person I was.

I have taken the first few steps to change and experience is .... not what i expected. At end I can say that whatever we feel about Indian Democracy, its best for indian Society.

-- Keep faith in India
- - Kalingaa..

Happy Independence Day to all Indians

From the day I can remember, I am used to go to school or near-by flag ceremony on I-Day. After that we had few cultural programme and in the end we used to get "Sweets".

Earlier it was for Sweets, then as I had more and more knwledge about India, It became emotional visit for me. After all this ceremonial processing, we used to ran to TV and watch live telecast from Red Fort,Delhi.

Now for the first time I am going to miss this great day as I am away from it. but Tiranga is in my heart. So I am with all of my dear friends. Also on the side "Happy I-Day" to Pakistan also.

Happy
Independence
Day to India



-- Keep India in your Heart
- - Kalinga..

Orkut.com

It was most easy way for me to communicate to people around me and people from other places too.
But from last few days and I think for next few months I have to be away from this as Where I am currently this site is not supported and I cant even view who scrapped me or not.

So do make any comment on this blog or mail me on kalingaa22@gmail.com to be in touch.
Hoping to get you all with this.

-- Kalingaa .. ( or Gajodhar ) what you name me....